I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize