dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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