Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
