Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
as a side note pls kill me
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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