shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
