sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Randomize
