The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize
