Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
