im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
