His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
you will always have a special place in my vag
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
