Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
