if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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