I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I'm at about main and main street
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
