It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
