i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize