marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
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