Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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