He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I have post one night stand depression
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