How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Randomize
