haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
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