i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
