so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize