Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
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