Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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