it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
it's like heaven, but drunker
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
