Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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