I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
You know, be my cock's hype man.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
