i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Randomize
