also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize