I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
