if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
i out mim tonsoeep
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