Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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