We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize
