So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
