Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
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