jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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