first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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