I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
