Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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