Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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