Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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