Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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