We're like a lot better than the average bears
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
