we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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