But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
