FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
