You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
