Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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