What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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