Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
