dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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