she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
