I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
